been a whilrwind of activity for the month of June and here into July.  This was from a few weeks ago-will catch up to the post-trip thoughts soon.

From Amy Carmichael’s Whispers of His Power-June 21st entry:

Isa 49:4 (margin): Then I said, I have labored in vain, I have spent my strength for naught, and in vain: yet surely my judgment is with the Lord, and my reward is with my God.

Matt. 20: 15: Is is not lawful for Me to do what I will with Mine own?

     Is it not lawful for Him to do what He wills with His own?  Is it not lawful for Him to allow us to wait on in faith? Is it not lawful for Him to allow His own to be disappointed?  Of course it is.
     This covers everything: all toil apparently (not really) spent in vain, all disappointments, all seeming failure.
     “To what purpose have I toiled? For waste and mist my vigor have I spent” (Isa. 49:4 Rotherham) is a Calvary word.  But there is a triumphant end to it: “And my God be proved to have been my strength.”
     Later when we look back we shall see the unexplained things of life shine like jewels.  We shall see that nothing was lost, nothing really was wasted.  There is no such thing as “love’s labor lost” with Him.
     Till then – Is it not lawful for Me to do what I will with Mine own?  Yes, Lord.

 Things as they are today, Amy’s words strike a chord.

i’ve spent the last 24 hours spinning circles in my head with thoughts-

why questions, so many whys

ultimately, getting to the bottom of things, the heart of things leads to the question i am really asking:

Why did cain kill able?  Why wasn’t his encounter with the living God………enough? able? something? … stop him?

the word there in that blank space is



here i am again, fallen in the trap of unbelief. of. God’s. Power.

and He would be right to respond with this:

Why dear child, do you doubt?

13 For I the Lord your God hold your right hand; I am the Lord, Who says to you, Fear not; I will help you!

14 Fear not, you worm Jacob, you men of Israel! I will help you, says the Lord; your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel.

15 Behold, I will make you to be a new, sharp, threshing instrument which has teeth; you shall thresh the mountains and beat them small, and shall make the hills like chaff.

16 You shall winnow them, and the wind shall carry them away, and the tempest or whirlwind shall scatter them. And you shall rejoice in the Lord, you shall glory in the Holy One of Israel.

17 The poor and needy are seeking water when there is none; their tongues are parched with thirst. I the Lord will answer them; I, the God of Israel, will not forsake them.

18 I will open rivers on the bare heights, and fountains in the midst of the valleys; I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water.

19 I will plant in the wilderness the cedar, the acacia, the myrtle, and the wild olive; I will set the cypress in the desert, the plane [tree] and the pine [tree] together,

20 That men may see and know and consider and understand together that the hand of the Lord has done this, that the Holy One of Israel has created it.


Behold!  He will, He will, He will….that men may see and know and consider and understand together that the hand of the Lord has done this, that the Holy One of Israel has created it.  Yes, Lord, it is lawful for You to do what You will with Your own.

for You are faithful

and You are Mighty in Strength

and yes, You are Power-Full

Help me to behold, to hang on, and to trust when my vison is dimmed and the beholding is delayed, and i am waiting.

“i pray also, that your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints, and His incomparably great power for us who believe.  That power is like the working of His mighty Strength, which He exerted in Christ when He raised Him from the dead.” Ephesians 1:18-19