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Recently i wrote about how i spoke with God about how i couldn’t pray.  i was well aware at the time at the seeming contraction with that statement.  i mean, i can’t count how many times i declared with all authority to a herd of preschoolers;

“Prayer is talking with God”

but i didn’t change it because that is precisely what happened.  i have spent many a time talking with God about how i’m having trouble talking with Him.

one evening i found myself at church alone so i decided to slip into the prayer room. maybe without the distractions that surround me at home prayer will come?  i don’t remember now what happened with that, but i do remember looking around at the books and stumbled upon The Believer’s Prayer Life by Andrew Murray.  i’ve been walking through it slowly and gaining some insights into this battlefield that i’m on.  one such insight is this one:

How does Satan hinder prayer?  By temptation to postpone or curtail it, by bringing in wandering thoughts and all sorts of distractions, through unbelief and hopelessness.  Happy is the prayer hero who, through all, takes care to hold fast and use his weapon…..After naming all the other parts of the armor, Paul adds:

“With all prayer and supplication in the Spirit” (Eph 6:18)

Without prayer, the helmet of Salvation, the shield of faith and the Sword of the Spirit, which is God’s Word, have no power.  All depends on prayer.  God teach us to believe and hold fast!

these words reinforce what i already believe.  Prayer is vital.  and it reminds me that there is a real enemy who has years of battle experience.

i am striving to hold fast

and begging the One with the stronger grip to hold fast to me.