i heard the news that the healing we’d prayed for hadn’t come.  i bent the knee and sat with my Father for a bit about it.  then i got up and wrote a card and gathered some things i thought would be a blessing.  but the note and the gifts were so close to my heart.  and i began to think about it.  what if they add to the struggle instead of bring comfort?  what if it’s all wrong?  what if they don’t get it? (i am aware of my odd-ness)  so i set it on my desk-and walked away thinking maybe i should forget the whole thing. the family gathered up to go out and last minute i mentioned that i had something to give our dear ones and could we just stop and put it in their mailbox on our way?  so we did.  and i prayed that the Lord would bring comfort.

i heard from a mutual friend just this past week what a blessing the gift was.  i shared how i tried to talk myself out of it.  she gave me a hug and whispered; “just keep listening to the Spirit-He directed and it’s good that you obeyed.”

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yesterday we received an invitation for a Harvest Party in the alleyway this evening.  There would be a Chili Cookoff * Pie Competition * Pumpkin Carving * Smores at the fire pit * Games * and more!  No we didn’t need to bring anything, just come!  The kids really wanted to go.  We’ve never met these neighbors-they are down the street, on the other side of the alley from us. 

we went.

the kids carved pumpkins, we joined in the sack race, wheelbarrow race, and 3 legged race.  We voted on our favorite chili, pie, and carved pumpkin.  The kids decorated cookies.  We drank hot cider and made smores around the fire pit.  We met some of our neighbors and their friends.  We had a great time. 

……………………………..

Life just takes courage.  it takes courage to share my heart with someone, and courage to meet new people.  it takes courage to take the bag to goodwill-trusting that i really don’t want what’s in it.  courage to engage with family who don’t get or really even like me.  courage to parent these children.  courage to go where Jesus sends me.  courage to answer the knock at the door.

but i’ve decided fear is a joy-sucker.  i could have just scrapped the gift idea and settled for praying only.  we could have stayed home tonight and enjoyed just each other’s company.  but we would have missed out. 

There are many commands that say “do not fear.”

but when i need courage-i am thankful for this one; “Whenever i am afraid i will trust in You.” 

when i am afraid, i pray

and He provides me courage.