it’s these things that make my heart skip.  i don’t really know how to describe it-the best thing i can come up with is:  being romanced by the King of Kings, which causes a depth of joy within.  it’s a joy of being known.  isn’t that what romance is?  a demonstration of being known and delighted in?

so these are a few examples that He’s given me very recently:

driving away from the sheriff’s office with my ‘credentials.’  i carry a very official sign that states: “Residential Access Pass”  i don’t know why, but it’s like an official statement of belonging.  my heart skips and i rejoice.

i got to go to those mountains today, pass in hand,  and experience the joy of fellowship and understanding-how strengthening it is for a heart to be understood.  and i am filled with joy in the midst of the struggles and grief’s of the latest disaster.

and then i go to pick up my boys from school.  they are in the music room, my middle son is wanting to learn a specific song for the talent show.  usually he gets his help on you-tube, but this song isn’t on there.  so he’s asked his music teacher to show him the parts and he can take it from there . 

“you taught him to play?”

“well……. well, kind of.  i never really learned to play, and i don’t know how to read music.  we moved a lot as a kid and some of our houses had piano’s in them and so i would play around on it a little.  i just have taught him the few songs i picked out-but i only know how to do the right hand.”

“have you thought of getting him lessons?”

sigh.  “yes……”  what she doesn’t know is that i’ve thought of it a lot.  i’ve prayed for it.  for the provision somehow.  and i’ve been watching and waiting for an answer for going on 5 years now as i watch him play his keyboard every. single. day.

“….it’s a budget issue..” i whisper out.  it’s not quite that simple, but that’s all i can muster as a response. 

“i understand…..i’d be happy to teach him.  he can stay afterschool for 30 minutes one day a week and then practice at home 30 minutes a day, Zeke would you want to do that?  would you be willing to do the work required?”

and i can’t even get the thank you out for the tears that are coming.

we talk about the details and a little more about our family as we really don’t know each other very well.  i explain Zeke’s sensory a little and a little bit about why we aren’t able to fit a real piano in our house (800 sq. ft, 2 bdrm, 5 people-i could say more,  that’s for another post .)

and my heart skips a beat. 

it’s not really about free piano lessons.  it’s so much more than that.  Christ knows the gift He’s given my son.  He knows …how hearing him play…the joy that brings to me.  and i was ok with leaving it at that.  But here, someone else delights in zeke’s gift and has the ability to help him in it and is happy to do so….just because.   and i can give nothing in return.

all these examples are really hard to put into words.  they relate to my innermost being, the part He knit and knows inside and out.  and that’s the main part of the joy-because i know that He knows the significance. 

These are some of the ways that He romances me.  and it draws my heart to fall deeper in love with this One who gives gifts for me to simply enjoy, just because. 

i delight in His provision.


this is part of a 31 day series on Provision.  To see the first post in the series click here.  To read the entire series click here and read backwards (the first post is listed last, the latest post is listed first-i don’t know how to change that. thank you for grace.)