the yellow ring around the toilet bowl is disgusting so i shut the lid and wash my hands of it. maybe tomorrow.
yesterday was spent on someone else’s needs.
and today the last one to catch the bug woke up with it.
and soreness from the fall yesterday while jogging with our Lady combines with fatigue from monthly hormones and i still can’t get out of my jammies.
thinking of how much to cancel today
thinking on and thinking on and thinking on the wretched state of this heart
out the window the sun still shines and the birds still sing
i have choices to make today
what will they be?
and who will really be the push behind them?
can i claim any ownership?
for the ability to pick up one foot and place it in front of the other and head outside?
or for the hymn that pandora picks, the one that closes these eyes and brings deep breaths and tears of being loved so.
prone to wander, Lord i feel it
the Work He does is amazing and the part i play is small.
and it’s unfair that i get to watch at all, with all the stomping and ranting i do deep within
– me, me, but what about ME?
-do i see today as a rest day-because Lord knows the work tomorrow will hold?
-do i see others as an assignment? or do i see them as a gift…to uproot me?
-do i see my children and their illnesses as an interruption? as a curse? or as a gift…too, to uproot more of me?
considering the lilies today and how He clothes them. they grow without toil or spinning.
if this uprooting of me continues, won’t the Designer Himself take root in my place?
do Your work my Master Gardener
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